It’s funny how often other people can see something in you that you’ve not recognised in yourself. I’ve not really particularly viewed myself as a determined person. I suppose because, ever since finishing A Levels, I’ve kind of been drifting between things. This is partly down to my unique circumstances (being in a long distance relationship for a number of years), but also because I was never 100% sure on what job to do. Then, after my A Levels didn’t go as well as planned, I’d really lost any incentive to go to university. Anyways, I suppose having all this in mind, I didn’t really view myself as being very determined.
That is, until a chat with a sweet lady from church got me thinking. We had agreed to go out for a walk (I’m trying to do walks daily to help with my sleep and thyroid probs) and a chat. This is quite a big feat for me by the way! Chatting with new people on my own is always a challenge (because of language) and I sometimes feel a bit anxious in new situations. So anyways, we were chatting whilst walking and it was really nice! She was telling me that her sister had gone to live in Germany for a while, as her boyfriend was from Germany, but found it too difficult and came back. And so she was asking me how I’d found it, coming out to live in Argentina, which was really nice actually, because to an extent, she could understand and tapped into some of the things that people don’t generally realise that are difficult when living in a different culture.
We then started talking about all sorts (you know how it is when women chat!) and got onto the subject of cooking. I told her that I’d decided that I’m gonna try to cook one, more complicated meal each week, rather than just shoving things in the oven or roasting vegetables (👌🏻 side point: hit me up with recipes please if you’ve got some guduns!), so that I can have more meals under my belt. (I imagine I will be head chef for a while when nolz and I get married and live together as I have a lot more experience than Nolz in the cooking department. I figure it will be good if at least one of us has a good lot of knowledge on cooking haha). So I told her my current repertoire, and she turned around and said along the lines of, “ya know what I see in you. That when you set your sights on something, you complete it. You are determined and you really work towards your goals”. That was quite a surprise to me as I hadn’t particularly thought of myself like that, because of the whole university thing.
But when I think about it, I can kinda see it. Living abroad is hard and grueling. In my case, particularly last year. I remember speaking to my sister and one of my pals, and them saying, obviously it’s not ideal, but if you’re really struggling, maybe you should come home for a bit, take stock, reconnect with England for a bit and then go back again. Dya know, it sounds silly to say, but that hadn’t even occured to me that I could. I had decided that I’d be in Arg until Nolz and I had more of an idea what we’d be doing in the future and going home wasn’t really on my radar. And, thankfully, although I really miss home and some days are harder than others, I’m much happier and comfortable here than I used to be. A lot due to being able to communicate to people now in Spanish!
After having this chat with this lady, I asked Nolz for his assessment on whether this is true that I’m determined. He laughed, and reminded me that nearly six years ago, very early on in when we got together I freaked him out completely by mentioning marriage 😂 poor love. (To be fair to me, going straight into long distance does rather put things into perspective when you start “dating” someone, especially when that someone is across the ocean from you!) anyways, he then proceeded to say, well, you decided to yaself I shall marry this Noly and nearly six years later, here we are, engaged to be married! (🥳🥳)
So anyways. I’ve decided to believe that it’s true that I am determined and brave and I’ma own it 💪🏻
Nadia's Adventures 